Issues & Alibis

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Don't Mess With A Nation...
I'm going to repeat that again for those of you on drugs...
By Ernest Stewart

"Hi, we're America! We build monster trucks for fun! We developed the top fuel dragster, zero to three hundred thirty miles an hour in under five seconds, cause, pffft, we were bored. Piss us off, heh, and see what we build! And we may feel bad about it later! Ask Japan. But before we feel bad... we're gonna jack you up! And then we're gonna send you FOOD! 'Cause we're America; we're schizophrenic. Don't mess with a nation that needs medication!'" ~~~ Christopher Titus

I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. ~~~ Hannibal Lector

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on." ~~~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

As Robin Williams said in "Good Morning Vietnam" "We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities." That's been the story of the Americas ever since whitey showed up in the late 15th century CE. Do as we say or we'll totally destroy your tribe. After hitting the world stage in the late 19th century we changed this mantra slightly to "We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities but then we'll rebuild them and send you food!" I wonder which is worse?

Or perhaps as Greg Lake foresaw back in those "days of future passed" of our immediate future...

Blood rack, barbed wire
Polititians funeral pyre
Innocents raped with napalm fire
Twenty first century schizoid man.

There's no doubt about it, folks, we're as crazy as can be. We demand that everybody be democratic unless, of course, they do as the Palestinians did, have free, open elections and elect someone that won't do our bidding; then all bets are off. By all means, do as we say, not as we do! Methinks Tom Lehrer said it best in, "Send The Marines..."

For might makes right,
And till they've seen the light,
They've got to be protected,
All their rights respected,
'Till somebody we like can be elected.

Another good example was the election in Iraq. We took Saddam's regime out and replaced it with one that was best friends with our worst enemy, Iran. Out of the frying pan... This was bad enough but as the world watched, we took our good friends, people we had supported and who had gladly done our bidding, and hung the lot of them. The lesson for the world was the quickest way to get your cities bombed to rubble and your leaders hung is to become friends with the US. Brilliant move, simply brilliant. NOT!

Meanwhile in Kabul, Afghani President Hamid Karzai announced that his choice for Vice President is the warlord Mohammad Qasim Fahim. I guess Darth Vader wasn't available? Oh, the tangled web we weave...

Another stable regime we replaced was in Pakistan, a country now on the edge of anarchy. Obama seems totally oblivious to this as we keep attacking Pakistan with wave after wave of Predator drones, creating a surge in recruits for the Taliban and Al Qaeda.

Of course, this is all necessary to keep the endless war going. If we didn't keep bombing innocents then eventually there would be no need for the military/industrial/media/banking complex, which is something that just won't do, America. Besides, it's not like we're killing white people! Well, a few in the Army but as Hank Kissinger once said of the troops, "Military men are dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns for foreign policy." You may also recall Henry's words as he sniffed Tricky Dick's jock strap, "Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac." Some think that Hitler let the Kissinger family go to America as an act of revenge, but I digress!

What Vietnam taught our betters was to go with an all-volunteer Army. No draft, no problems! With the temporary ramping down of the wars so that the National Guard and Army Reserves are on hand just in time to back up plans for the various quarantines and round ups for the Happy Camps(tm) to come! We've always had a love/hate relationship with the world but now we have it with ourselves as well!

In Other News

I see where the "Just-us Department" is recommending that there be no criminal prosecution for Bush-era torturers, their bosses and the lawyers. Perhaps, just maybe, but nothing is certain, John Yoo and Jay Bybee, but definitely not Steven Bradbury, just might, perhaps could be disbarred but I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for it to happen if I were you!

Of course, a few weeks ago on "Beat The Press" White House Chief of Staff and Israeli 5th columnist, Rahm Emanuel, said despite their many war crimes, crimes against humanity, and the authorization of torture and kidnapping, no one from the Crime Family Bush would be prosecuted for any crime as the ruling elite is above the law, or words to that effect!

A few days later, the Changeling said much the same thing. He has also had his "Just-us Department" fight in various federal court cases to uphold the various acts of treason, war crimes and such that Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Rice, Ashcroft, Powell, Tenet, Goss, Hayden, Mueller, Gonzales, Holder and the rest committed for their corpo-rat masters. All done just to frighten us and make a buck by murdering millions of innocents!

Again and again, we find that there will be no changes from the past, at least no important changes, and Foggy Bottom will go on as always by screwing the people and making themselves wealthy. Obama is just the latest in a very long line of criminals who have held the Oval Office, just another white male, as always! Cynthia and Rosa would have brought real change but few people listened to them. As old Pete Seeger once asked, "When will they ever learn? When will they ever learn?" My guess is that they'll never learn, which is exactly what our masters are counting on!

And Finally

We're down but not out thanks to the generosity of Jack Kash, Doctor Phil and Mary Lou all who sent in generous donations to the cause last week. This is a good start but only 1/3 the money we need to start up again and about 10% of what we're going to need to pay for the magazine for a year.

If everyone on the mailing list sent in just twenty dollars a year, not a week or a month but a year, we'd be solvent again. The same could be said of the group. If they sent in $20 a year, we'd be fine. Or if the readership all just chipped in a buck, we could keep the magazine going.

The trouble with publishing a radical/liberal magazine is that the very people who read it are usually poor as radicals and liberals traditionally have little money except for food and a roof over their heads, if they're lucky. The right, which is made up of millionaires, billionaires and really stupid middle class and working class people, is swimming in cash, having stolen it from the radicals and liberals, so Rush and the rest won't ever have to worry about if they're going to make their bills.

Way back when I started the magazine I, too, was middle class and had no need to periodically beg for funds but thanks to 8 years of the Crime Family Bush, my bank accounts have grown quite empty. For a while, we did manage to attract a few leftists with disposable income who kept us afloat but unfortunately they, like Elvis, have left the planet and those funds are gone. Of course, on top of all this, is the Bush Depression, which is filling the streets up with the newly homeless, including many of our past supporters. No one is going to send in a donation for an Internet magazine when they can no longer get on the Internet to read it!

So, if you still have a good paying job, do sit down today and send us in what you can. If enough of you do so, we'll be back up and operating just as soon as you do. Bringing you the information that you cannot live without!


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Until the next time, Peace!
(c) 2009 Ernest Stewart a.k.a. Uncle Ernie is an unabashed radical, author, stand-up comic, DJ, actor, political pundit and for the last 8 years managing editor and publisher of Issues & Alibis magazine. In his spare time he is an actor, writer and an associate producer for the new motion picture "W The Movie."


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Issues & Alibis Vol 9 # 19 (c) 05/08/2009

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